When you are in healthy relationships, you do not ask questions like “how to get out of a toxic relationship“. Everything works. When you are in toxic relationships, everything seems to be working, but it is an illusion. Most people tend to create relationships as they feel happier being stuck to someone. We all need a particular person to share dreams and develop plans together.
No relationship is perfect. Sometimes we seek to love and recognition so much that we tend to close eyes to the evident toxic relationships signs. We create destructive connections with friends and lovers, coworkers, and relatives. Nevertheless, in some cases, unhealthy connections develop from normal full of love and support.
Though relations evolve, they change with people changing. They turn into unhealthy and critical well-being and hurt both sides.8 Ways On How To Get Out Of A Toxic Relationship Click To Tweet
Why do people stay in toxic relationships? Usually, this tendency goes from childhood when a person has observed toxic relationships in the family, and there was no positive type of family to follow. Or it can be the repeated variant of unhealthy romantic relationships in the past. Sometimes it is just the union of two people who do not suit each other. They are not bad people at all, but they cannot create healthy relations with each other. Sometimes people, especially women, stay touched to toxic partners in loving memory of good all days and dream of the positive changes.
Do you want to know how to leave a toxic relationship? Follow our article and get the answers.
What is a toxic relationship?
What does toxic mean in a relationship? Toxic relationship definition is characterized as relations full of a critical level of anxiety, damage, and intensity. You can even have feelings of panic attacks and real tension all the time.
No matter what type of toxic relationship you are in, your partner criticizes and manipulates you in every possible way. It can be a tyrant partner, a critical boss, or demanding parents. You have no idea what your guilt is, but you feel guilty almost all the time.
You try to change your behavior, but it is never enough. There will be another reason to control you. If you are constantly wondering and asking yourself the question of “is my relationship toxic?“, here are popular toxic relationship signs to shed some lights to your queries. Keep reading.
8 signs of a toxic relationship
1. Total control
You can forget about your privacy. All your gadgets and bills are checked every day. You have to care about any word said and the people calling you. Otherwise, you may have problems with your partner. What article are you reading right now? Show me! Is it familiar to you?
2. You feel unhappy
You do not feel happy, or, at least, satisfied with life. You go to bed in a depressed mood and wake up with no desire to live. You cannot watch romantic comedies as you dream of the same care and support you notice there. You dream about changes, but you always live in a dream.
3. Constant jealousy
Feeling jealousy is natural when there are some signs showing dishonesty. Though there is nothing or nobody to be jealous about, such behavior can be harmful and destructive. You cannot communicate with people; otherwise, you will be blamed for dishonesty. So, you prefer to stay away from possible problems and reduce the number of people around.
4. Lack of support
When you come home after a long day full of problems, you need someone to share the news and to get some kind of support. When you see the wall, instead, any mental health would be a struggle. All love and support come from you, and there is no feedback.
5. Lack of communication
It is strange, but sometimes you have nobody to communicate with even if you live or work with the most controlling person in the world. You just have to present the reports and be nice. It is called solitude in a relationship, and it is extremely destructive for normal people.
Oh, lies can totally change any personality. You have to be honest, but your partner does not want to follow the same rule. As a result, you feel betrayed. You may turn to a jealous and suspicious creature from a strong person. And it will be your fault again.
7. Negative financial line
Your partner makes financial decisions without consulting you. If you have a separated family bank account, the partner may create a personal hidden account to have extra money.
8. No self-care
As a result of the destroying behavior, you stop caring about health, neglect free time and hobbies. You do not appreciate yourself as the partner does not appreciate you. It is the next stage of mental illness that leads to self-destruction. So, you have to think twice if you want to destroy your life and mental stability.
Toxic relationship quiz. Answer the following
If you want to know how to recognize toxic relationships, answer a few questions.
- Do you feel anxious about the mood of your partner coming home soon?
- Do you have to report about everything in your life?
- Have you ever experienced manipulation in relationships?
- Do you try to control your behavior to be nice?
- Do you try to control your behavior to be nice?
- Have you ever been asked to quit something important to you?
If you have answered “yes” to some questions, welcome to the toxic relationships club. And it is up to you to decide if you really need this destructive life program and a toxic person next to you.
How to jump out of toxic relationship?
Many people enter the dating world without any idea how to protect personal boundaries. We do not have this subject at school.
Avoiding toxic relationships is easier when you realize that something was wrong with your previous relationships. You need to have some experience. If you have no experience, you may be involved in this game very easily.
It is really a kind of game. The manipulator ties you together with several simple positive and negative actions. Usually, one “bad” action is followed by several “good” actions. That is how the linking is working. You will be linked very fast and wait for a “good” period to come again.
Though nothing toxic starts suddenly. No one would like to date a tyrant, or no one dreams of having a horrible boss at work. The first toxic signs were slightly noticeable.
Some people believe that they can still fix toxic relationships at this stage. We have to admit that you must care about personal boundaries. Sometimes your partner really never wanted to hurt you, but being toxic is the only way available to your beloved.
Start from building communication, and you will understand if you’re going to get rid of toxic relationships or try to fix them.
1. Ask for help
The first step is done; you have admitted that you feel harm. If you decide to get freedom from toxic relationships, but you never dare to start, ask for help. Usually, toxic relationships are very obvious from the outside.
Ask your friends or relatives to give you support. It is essential not to be criticized by them. At some stages of such hurting relationships, the subordinate part is controlled so profoundly that any riot is not possible.
Sometimes we do need a person who will take our hand and lead us to the sunshine of ending toxic relationships literally. And it is also an excellent opportunity to understand who are your real friends with outstanding support and who just pretend to be those.
2. Show your feelings
Some people think that you can change your partner by following the offered rules. Others try to keep silent when they are manipulated and hurt. None of these strategies work.
It is an excellent example of how toxic relationships affect your mental health. You adapt every time your partner wants you to; you change and move personal boundaries. But it does not work.
You feel unhappy and broken, and it is an excellent possibility for the partner to take more control over you. Do not be shy; show your feelings and show that you are not happy with hurtful behavior. Let the truth be your weapon.
You have to understand that toxic relations may be cured, but there is one significant rule. Both partners should desire these changes. It is teamwork; otherwise, you have to leave this fantasy of changes.
3. Make an exit plan
Since you decide to let go of toxic relationships, make a prison break plan in detail. It may take more time if you totally depend on the partner. The master in a toxic relationship usually prefers to control all spheres of life, so, naturally, one day, you find yourself without any job and income.
If you need money, try to save something or ask someone to help you. Suppose you need shelter, better look for something safe in advance. But usually, all you need is to believe that you are strong and no one has any rights to hurt you.
You can change the meaning of toxic relationships by only one step – to believe in yourself.
4. Set clear boundaries
Once it is evident to you that toxic relationships cannot be fixed, it is better to leave. Now you have to build boundaries again, but these boundaries are for yourself. You will miss your partner. And it is absolutely natural.
Any relationship is a mixture of good and bad things, so you will remember only positive moments and miss them. So, protect the boundaries you have created. Once you try to return the toxic partner, you will be happy for several days. Then all the wrong moments will come out twice more.
Read more: 11 Things That You Shouldn’t Apologize For
5. Find a support
Toxic relationships psychology proves that it is the stage when you may need professional support. If your mind has been attacked for an extended period of time, you may have mental problems you do not notice. Professional therapy is necessary if you want to know how to stop toxic relationships in the future. Sometimes we are hurt as much as we continue creating the same behavior patterns again and again.
6. Break the usual pattern
So, if you want to create new healthy relations, break typical patterns. It does not mean that you have to jump into new relations to prove something to your ‘ex’. Relations are not the result of modifying a person. You and your desires are important. Concentrate on your future and your desires to have a healthy mental behavior again.
7. Find a new goal
First, try to understand what you want from life. Being in toxic relationships has shown that you need some problems to feel like an all-in-one person. Do you know what your personal dreams are? What would you do if you could afford anything you want? Think over the future life. What were your plans before you were stuck in toxic relationships? Do you still want to be there?
8. Detox line
When you leave your critical dishonest partner, you will need some time to return to the normal version of yourself. Toxic relationships have a tendency to change a personality. You may need more time than you have spent in relations. No matter, it is a normal recovery process and a bold step for your future life.
Leaving a toxic relationship
You have to understand one constant message. Toxic relationship psychology is based on absolute control and humiliating a partner’s needs. It is not your fault by all means. The tyrant partner has probably ruined some relationships before. But the effects of toxic relationships can be unpredictable and destructive for both partners.
Sometimes we hope we have answers on how to fix a toxic relationship but in the end, cutting off your toxic partner may be exhausting but a necessary process. But we are sure that you will be brave again to start dating after a long period of recovery.
Stay true to your personality, dreams, and values, and you will be satisfied with new healthy relations soon.
Have you ever been into toxic relationships? Did you manage to escape?